Here am I; send me

I've been thinking a lot lately about a night a few years ago. I'm not sure how many years, as I don't remember what year it was exactly, but I was still in high school.
It was a sticky Midwestern night in Carbondale, Illinois. Southland's youth group was at the Christ in Youth conference that we attended every summer. But this night was different than any other night at any other CIY I've ever been to.

You see, this was the night that I first felt called out into the world for mission type work in some form or fashion. This was the year that CIY made the Baht video about Rapha house and I was ready to go to Cambodia right then and there (I still want to go to Cambodia).
I had no idea that years later I would find myself in Nicaragua over Christmas break, absolutely sure that that's the kind of thing I was supposed to be doing for the rest of my life. Granted, I still don't know what this will look like exactly, but I do feel God's call on my life to go love on people all around this great big world.

And the coolest thing happened tonight. I was sitting in Fuge's worship service, thinking about that night at CIY years ago. I was thinking how scary it felt to know I was called to something so big and not having a clue where to begin. I was thinking about the kids filling the chapel who might be feeling how I felt that night.

And then I got a message from one of our church's other youth sponsors. Tonight was the last night of CIY for them. And as it turns out, one of our youth group girls felt that same call this week that I first felt however many years ago. And I get the absolute privilege of sitting down and talking to her about missions when I go home. And I couldn't be more excited. I can't wait to share my passion and my heart for the while at the same time watching that grow in one of my youth group girls!

I don't have a great conclusion here, I was hust so excited and had to share what a cool night it has been :)

We're going to be best friends...

"We're going to be best friends."
"Oh we are?"
"Yep, we're going to be best friends and you're going to tell me all about your life and it'll be great."
"Sorry, no. I don't do that."
That's a real conversation I had near the beginning of the summer. And it's weird. I just wrote it off after that day and continued to work with this person like normal.
That was, until a couple days ago. Because, you see, at the end of last week my brain decided to do that funny thing where it goes all wonky for an undetermined amount of time. And for a few days, things were not good inside my brain. And when things are not good inside my brain, I'm kind of a bummer to be around. But it's the people who stick by me in those times that I cherish most. It's the ones who can see through my excuses who don't take, "I'm fine" for an answer and who let me care who I know I can lean on if I need to. And that's exactly what this person did for me last week. She was there. She let me know she cared. When I text her over the weekend to say thanks for caring, her response was simply, "I told we'd be friends and that's what friends do." And I was blown away by that.
So tomorrow, we're going to sit down and talk about my life. And that's something I don't do. But I have been so blessed to find an amazing new friend and confidant here that I'm going to let her in even though that's hard for me.

That's what's on my mind tonight...but in the way of my normal camp life update, last week was rather boring. It was a very small week so things were slow and the week kind of dragged. My mom is in New Mexico right now! And we had community day on Saturday. It was very cool to see everyone get to come out and enjoy this amazing place for the day. I guess that all I got for ya this week. Thanks for keeping up with my life and the interesting journey that this summer has been.